June 2010 Update

Hello Family!

Here is a great story: A long long time ago in a far far away place...Redwood Falls....we had a youth group. We have kept in touch with some of these kids as they have grown into young adults. Some came with us last winter to our Chi Alpha SALT conference. That was a hoot! But one young man from this crowd talks to Phil about once a week. He was telling Phil that God had convicted him of the way he had been treating a young lady he worked with. I'm not sure of all the details, but it sounded to me like she was reflecting some stuff this young man was trying to distance himself from- ie, she wasn't a believer. But God convicted him that she was His daughter, she was a Princess in His eyes, and he needed to treat her that way.

So our young friend started to do that. He was kind. He noticed she didn't have food for lunch sometimes, so he shared his lunches. They began to be friends.

Then he asked Phil if he should share the gospel with her. Phil said, "you know, don't push it. Be her friend. Love her. Ask God for an opening, and follow His lead." Basically, "love her without an agenda."

So our friend did that. He asked God for an opening, for Him to lead in this relationship, this friendship. And God did! Our friend was able to lead this young lady to the Lord- and now she is excitedly growing and learning about her new faith! How amazing is that!!??

They continue to learn and grow together. What a blessing.

We continue to meet with students and anyone who will join us on Friday nights to worship and pray for each other, our campus, and our community. There are some international students around for the summer, so we get to see them. We just finished the Danny Silk Relationship dvd's on Tuesday nights, and will be taking a summer hiatus from Tuesdays. Fall will come quickly!

So bless you family, have a wonderful June!

Phil & Michelle & tribe

Just a little snapshot for you...

Wish I had a picture for you: our international students have NEVER jumped on a trampoline! Our neighbors have one- and we took the load of them over there a few weeks ago. Wow. I am told it was hilarious. Such a good release after stressful finals! A few days ago, Mingma came for brunch before we took him to the airport. He'll be back in August, but is spending his summer with his Mom who is visiting relatives in New York. Phil and Eli took him over to the Wille's for one more jump on the tramp. He said to Phil, while jumping, "When I am on the trampoline, I am the child."

Just had to share that one!!

Summer !

Have you ever had a list longer than your summer? That's pretty much our summer :) But it's ok- we have great friends and students like Mark, Susan, and Nolan, who share their time and help us get stuff done around here. Most of you know we put in 300 raspberry plants, blueberries, apples trees, and peonies last summer with the hopes of a "thooft family summer job" - and the deer promptly started enjoying. So this week, after a year long wait, the DNR is putting up our fence. With our help. It's been fun. You can see more at www.downtoearthgardener.wordpress.com.

Phil has been enjoying his Thursday night men's group, and we are still going through our Danny Silk Relationship dvd's on Tuesdays. Although in the summer, it's kind of hit and miss. And Friday nights, we worship & pray at the Thooft ranch. We hope to be full time on campus again by fall, but frankly, that would take a miracle, and while we believe in miracles, right now we have a plan A and a plan B. :) Plan A- back on campus full time, Plan B- keep doing what we're doing until we can be back on full time. Thank you so much, all of you who continue to support us with your prayers and finances. You bless us SO MUCH!!

Saturday morning, we say goodbye to another international student, Mingma. But he's only leaving for the summer, so this time the trip to the airport isn't a sad one. So many are coming back!

We also hope to get a group of students to the cities in June for Reach the U at the North Central campus. Working on it.

Grace is taking a Doula training course- and I have to go pick her up! I just wanted to give you a quick update, family. Hope your May is as lovely as ours!

Love, Us Thoofts

Staff Retreat

Once a year, Mike calls all us MN Chi Alpha staff together for a staff retreat. It's great. We talk shop, but we also hang out and play games and laugh and de-compress. And we remember we're not alone :) We had a blast- I didn't take any pictures, but here's a few Jeff took. Top left, a bunch of us playing Settlers. Uh....we Thooft's have a few unofficial Settler's rules that can drive the more competitve a little crazy. Like, we give stuff away out of mercy. So, I played that way....and won the game. Hilarious. Top right, a fabulous shot of our fearless leader, Mike. He's so funny. That's Chuck Haavik from UMD next to him. Bottom, Phil and Ashok doing what Ashok does best: laughing. What a breath of fresh air it was!

Hate it when my babies leave....

Ok, so I know a lot of you are empty nesters. And we're not, not quite yet, although it's coming too darn soon. Today I performed a campus pastor ritual. I drove a student to the airport. Only this time, it was for good. Ming came to BSU last fall, became our "daughter" via family friends, stayed a year, and transferred.

She is on her way to Dallas, TX. Anyone know any mothers & fathers in Dallas? How about Ocean City? New York? Pittsburg? Baltimore?

This is where they are all going, some for the summer, some for good. They need families who will love them and help them through crazy unfamiliar American stuff. Enjoy them. Let them teach you to cook. If anyone reading this has any connections, please let me know, and I will connect you to our kids, so they can become your kids.

You know, Fidel Castro came to the US as a student. Four years later, he left, hating America and Americans. Went on to control a country and kill a lot of people, to put it simply. What if an American family had befriended him? Loved him, honored him? What would our world look like today?

Anyway, I have to go make lunch for my own babies. But I have a young lady on a plane to Dallas right now that I left with tears in her eyes, and mine. I hate it when they leave. So please keep Ming - and Tenzin and Tashi- in your prayers. They have left Bemidji for good, with the gospel told and hopefully, shown. Pray for their safety- all of them- Sudhir and Bina and Bikash and Anish and Sanjay - there are so many more!

Thank you for partnering with us!

Love, us Thoofts

An Excellent Resource!

Hey Family!

I don't know if I mentioned it or not, but we're going through Danny Silk's DVD set, "Defining the Relationship" on Tuesday nights at Chi Alpha. It is- what. Eye-opening. Healthy. Life changing.

Phil and I have been married for almost 20 years, and we have been through a lot of stuff. We started out tough. Neither of us had any relationship skills, or any life skills, really. Just sort of "winged it." We didn't even have pre-marital counseling. No idea how to handle money or arguments or raise children.

By the grace of God alone, we are still married & thriving, 20 years later! Yay! And we've learned a ton. So after 20 years, you kind of think you got it, or at least most of it, you know? I mean, we don't think that out loud- it's just sort of there in the back of your mind. Well. One listen to this dvd set and we realized we don't know nothin'.

So three listens later, we are still getting good good good stuff. I have learned that my primary love languages- meaning how I hear that someone loves me - are words of affirmation and acts of service. How do I know? When someone needs to tell me something critical- something I need to hear- the only way I can hear it without going into attack/defense mode is what Danny calls a "hero sandwich." It looks like this: "You rock/you suck/you rock." IE- Tell me something good about what I'm doing, then tell me what I'm doing wrong, then tell me something good again. I'll hear it better that way, and I'll know you love me and not trying to hurt me.

See? Good stuff, I told you.

There are several couples and several singles going through the dvd's with us right now. It's finals week, so tonight is our last night on campus. We will continue with this at our home this summer, meeting on Tuesday nights. There are 9 sessions, and once we are through, we will probably just start all over and go through again this summer, for people who want to get in on it.

If you want to get in on it and you aren't in Bemidji, here's a link where you can buy the set:

http://www.ibethel.org/store/advanced_search_result.php?search_in_description=1&categories_id=0&keywords=Defining+the+Relationship&x=10&y=2


You won't regret it. It's all about healthy relationships- no matter where we are. Marriage, family, raising kids, work, ministry, art, music- whatever, whatever. Learn to relate well and you will influence the world.

Have a great day!

International Party Time!

Well family we had a wow weekend! Friday night was our worship night and we had a crowd. We prayed for situations brewing in our town, and grieved over the death of our friend Dan Cornia. He was 52 and brain cancer took his life. Super illegal. But we still believe.

Saturday night we had a crowd of teenagers. They're always such a hoot. Sunday afternoon our friend Sudhir came and started cooking. That man can cook. I feel like I know a few things in the kitchen, but when Sudhir comes, I am a kindergardener. So we chopped oceans of onions and carefully avoided the "american killer" peppers he loves to put in stuff, and mashed garlic and ginger. He talked of the open markets in Kathmandu, and how by 7 at night the temperatures have cooled from the daytime 110, and people start coming out, coming to the markets. You can buy anything there, he says. It is a wonderful place to see friends and hang out. He wants us to come to Kathmandu with him in three years when he travels home. They all tell us stories of the monkeys that roam the streets- like the squirrels we have here. If you're not careful, the monkeys will steal your food. You have to hide it. One jumped on Bina once and pulled a bag of chips out of her backpack! We hope to travel there someday.

By 6 ish, he left to go pick up a carload of friends, and Phil did the same. I think the final count last night was 15 Nepalis, 13 americans. At one point we were all gathered around the kitchen island wrapping momo. Sanjay was teaching me how to do it right. He said something to Asmita, and she answered back in Nepali. I copied her. Laughter erupted all around, because what I said to Sanjay, with apparent gusto and not meaning to obviously, was "shut up!" Hilarious.

It was Eli's 7th birthday yesterday. I knew our friends were planning to go together and buy him a gift- but I didn't expect a BIKE!! They showed up with a super cool red dirt bike - with training wheels!! He was freaking out. Then the second car load showed up with Atlantis Legos - !! And puzzles!! and Bionicles!! The kid had a banner day!

Bina- Sudhir's un-official fiance- brought a surprise last night. She brought 2 saris- traditional dress for Nepai women. And she "dressed up" myself and my friend Cheryl, who was a tremendous sport, I might add! It was really funny walking out of the dressing room (our bedroom) all decked out like a Nepali woman going to a party. So fun to see the looks on their faces- us white ladies wearing their dress. I felt like I honored them. And it was a blast. Grace tried one on later and loved it.

You know, Eli coined a word for our international friends. He calls them his "exotic" friends. So we white gals got to wear their exotic clothing. They said that if we were walking down the streets of Kathmandu, we would turn a lot of heads. Not necessarily because of our dress, but because we're so white, in our dress. A friend of ours tells a funny story about being in Kathmandu. One night after stuff was locked down for the night- apparently if you're a tourist they don't suggest you go out at night- and the hotel doors were locked. So he and his friend snuck out a window and followed the sound of music. Locating the door from which behind came the strains, they pounded. The door flung open to reveal a wedding party. The partiers eyes lit up, they grabbed our friends by the shirt, and pulled them into the room, exclaiming, "white man!!" Apparently we are good luck at a wedding.

So we partied last night, in our saris, with oceans of spicy food and american friends who understand that here is a crowd of the world in our livingroom. Chi Alpha's mission statement is to transform the university, the marketplace, and the world. The world comes right to our door, so by loving them, they go back and transform their culture. This is international relations at it's best. And it's so dang easy. And fun. Saturday we're all invited to Sudhir's house to party. I am so looking forward to it!

Have a fabulous day, family! we love you!